CREEEEEAAAAAAKKK

A  little over a year ago, we bought new furniture for the family room.  The futon couch we'd had since before we were married was long past its sell-by date and the 'nice' chair was no longer so nice because of our then-toddler's penchant for climbing all over it.  That thing was more rickety than a ride at Kennywood.

So, we picked out a new couch, a side table, and a lovely leather recliner.  We thought "Hey!  Leather is easy to clean and we have an infant with reflux and a messy 4 year old.  Perfect!"  We slapped down the money and had them deliver it all.

A year down the line and that seemingly genius idea to buy leather is a lot less genius.

See, Liam has a little problem with the ability to sit still.  As in, he does not possess this ability.  He is physically incapable of sitting still for longer than a nanosecond.

Leather has many wondrous properties but the one drawback is that it is not silent.  It creaks, you see.  I'm not even sure that's the right descriptive word but as you move around on it, it makes noise as the leather rubs against the leather.

Squirmy Liam + creaky leather = INSANE MOMMY.

He'll sit down.  Then he'll recline.  Then he needs a drink so he sits up to get it.  Then he reclines again.  Then he needs a snack so he leans over to get it.  Then he swivels his body upside down on the chair.  Then he hangs over the arm of the chair to get a toy (which makes me MENTAL because this is what destroyed the other chair in the room).  Then he reclines again.  Then he needs to climb down and pee.  Then he climbs back up.

Every. single. movement. he makes causes noise.  It's like nails on a chalkboard only leathery.  I just want to shriek at the top of my lungs "SIT STILL!"  If this keeps up, I'm going to develop a tic.

Consider this a cautionary tale the next time you buy furniture.  If you want leather but have a squirmy kid, you might want to think twice.